Do You Really Need a Literary Agent?

A few recent submissions with original spellings which show the faith some people have in an agent’s range of expertise and powers.

I write for pleasure.

I wont to do tv and film exrea wotrk

We would like to ask you if you look at Travel Feature Packages?

I would like to write an article for a major newspaper of magazine. Can you help me get my article published? If you cannot can you tell me who can help me?

Harley-Davidson is launching a brand new motorcycle in the coming months and we would like the honour of presenting Bono with the first one... I understand you are not his agent but if you could pass this email onto the relevant people or give me a telephone number or email that would be greatly appreciated.

What type of paper is a novel printed on. eg 60gsm. On the face of it, this sounds like a daft question but when looking at a number of published books, it is apparent that they are printed on a slightly grey-like paper.

I have created a technique for women who struggle to become pregnant.

As a 21 year-old college student, I accidentally uncovered a plot to overthrow the government of the United States. What I am about to disclose to you 100% true.

Please do a favour. Let me know the names of couple of top agents who have contributed for a Booker winner.

I would never have considered myself a literalist, although I have written numerous communications for Royal Mail.

Dear Mrs. ANDREW, I am a great fan of yours.I would be very happy if you could fulfill my wishes. Would you please send me two signed photos of yours? I am a Civil Lawyer. I have a Client that has Interest in Investing on a Real Estate Management in Your Country, Can you be of Assistance?

H.R.M OTOMFUO (KING) OF ASHANTI KINGDOM, with an investment offer

I the girl from Russia. My name is Nadezhda.

I am from Saint-Petersburg. I have fair hair and blue eyes. My height: 5 ' 2 " and weight: 115 lbs. I am 27 years old. I have been born 10/29/1980. On star sign Scorpion I am ready for creation family and want it very much. I cannot find the man in Russia for myself because it very hard in Russia. I want to create family and to live in your country because the government to care about people. I got your e-mail through internet dating agency

We are looking to discuss an Interactive product with Tony Blair. As you move in these circles, I wondered if you would know who would be covering that area of representation for Mr. Blair?

I have discovered a way to extract hydrogen from water at commercial quantities that can make hydrogen the least expensive fuel for all internal combustion engines and turbines….I also prove the British BBC to be wrong. If you choose not to represent me, could you keep the facts about proving the BBC wrong -- secret?

Do you accept also literary operas in italian?

I am hopeful that he or your company may be aware - because of past research - if there are any books available to buy relating to Deptford and especially during its time of involvement with the Royal Navy.

On behalf of the trustees and executor of the estate of Late Sir. Dennis Thatcher, I wish to notify you that late Sir. Dennis Thatcher, made you a beneficiary to his WILL. He left the sum of Nine Hundred and Fifty Thousand Pounds Sterling (£950,000.00) to you in the codicil and last testament to his WILL. This may sound strange and unbelievable to you, but it is real and true.

I am writing this to see if you would be interested in marketing my 3-in-1 product: a book of philosophy, a movie script, and music, titled "The True American Dream, a Prototype of the 21st Century World". It's a design of a new world, a universal code for living, a manual on how to be the happiest, the most complete, and the most powerful being one can ever be.

About article author

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Andrew Lownie

Andrew Lownie was born in 1961 and was educated in Britain and America. He read history at Magdalene College, Cambridge where he was President of the Union. He went on to gain an MSc at Edinburgh University and spend a year at the College of Law in London. After a period as a bookseller and jour...More about Andrew Lownie